I’m here for a visit with Dr Annie Chan my radiology/oncology doctor. It’s in the basement of the Lunder building. I smile as I hear someone ring the bell. It brings back the feeling of having finished myself. Might have been one of the few times I cried for myself. Lot of tears for my dad but I think that day was a reality check for all that I went through. Brought tears today too. I’ve been a brat- stalking my MRI results from Saturday which still aren’t back yet. Wonder what she will tell me. I parked in space 444 in the lot so hoping this is good luck that the news will be good. More concerned about the brain necrosis because my wonderful ENT who went up my nose with a metal hose said I get a B+ for the status of my sinuses. Bs get degrees so I’m hoping to get through. And after an hour. The results came back. Alls looking good. Dr Chan went up my nose with a rubber hose. Said everything looks good. So six months of no worri
Posts
18 months and alls well
So. It’s not surprising that there is some weird shit going on in my brain. Check out the images from todays mri and CT. Says I could have temporal lobe necrosis with edema which would explain recent memory difficulty Dysfunction in the temporal lobe may cause dysfunction in the mind.
9 month scan
October 19 2021 It’s been over a year since the adventure with cancer began. And I’m in for my visit. It’s been 9 months since my last radiation. And while I have definitely been improving. It is certain that no treatment comes without a price. I have neuropathy in my feet. Raynaud like fingers. Left shoulder and right hip pain and worst of all is the trouble swallowing. Some foods just don’t want to go down But everything comes with a price and I would take those things over dying of cancer. While looking for a place to document in notes I found the eulogy I wrote a year ago to save my family from writing one. I am so grateful we did not need to use it. So unbelievably grateful. I haven’t felt well this past week and had a few days of fevers but my COVID negative test helped me to rally for my appointment with Dr Worth. Psyching myself up for the scope up the nose to see if there are any lesions. this may be the quote of the week Dr W
Two month scan
3/23 I’m walking on sunshine and it’s time to feel good. https://youtu.be/CKh0dLIuIu8 I’m all over the place this morning. Dropped kate at the bus at 6. Took a shower (something I usually don’t do it there isn’t an hour to rest after) Have early appointments with Dr Chan and Dr Wirth. Waiting to hear the results of my two month scans. Yes. It’s been two months since I was treated with chemo and radiation. It’s been the hardest two months outside of the times when declan had open heart surgery and my dad was at the brigham. I struggle with appetite and fatigue and am the only person I know who doesn’t want to lose weight. I now weigh less than I did when I got married at 22. And to be honest I have plenty to lose. But in the right way. I look in the mirror and don’t recognize myself sometimes. The buzz cut with the crazy cowlicks and huge bald spot from the radiation. At the same time I feel like I am gaining. I made it ten hours at the brigham
What’s next
Having symptoms still Plan is to scan me in April so lots of waiting to do Medically Home is monitoring me from here. Lucky to have nurses like Emily and Melissa and Sarah keeping an eye on my labs and survey. Still needing IV fluids at home as it’s really hard to take in anything by mouth My heart rate was low over the weekend so they sent out someone for an EKG and then Melissa came for a blood draw. My Potassium and Magnesium are super low so they are sending out some replacements today. Dr Clark was right on about this week after chemo. I think I expected to be on the rebound but the chemo and radiation’s are still damaging the tissue. It’s like constant hand foot and mouth with sores all over my gums, tongue and palate. Makes it really hard to swallow. I’ve been taking pain meds steadily with magic mouthwash to help a little but it’s nearly impossible to get anything down. Hoping maybe another week and should see improvement. I have an appointment on Friday to
Radiation Journal
11/23 Had a nice thanksgiving dinner last night. Figured we would do it early because my food aversions will be back on Thursday and poultry hasn’t cut it before so I wasn’t expecting it to be any better for thanksgiving. Tried Nothing Bundt Cakes and it was a big hit. Liz brought over quebrada treats too and kate made an apple crisp. It’s all about deserts right? This morning I got up and put on my new “absolutely radiant” shirt from Jen. Love it! Perfect for my first day. I’m not feeling nervous - just really want to get it overwith. I get in and the machine is an hour behind already. There goes the whole “in and out in fifteen minutes” thing. So I was in for about a half hour it was very spaceage big white machine moving all around Q 11/24 2 down 33 to go. 4 chemo cycles down and 6 to go. Took some Ativan today before my appointment. Made it a lot faster and less stressful. Problem is I fell asleep in the waiting room waiting to see Dr Chan and they all wondere